For a while now, I’ve been thinking about doing some volunteer work or something generally humanitarian. I finally decided on neighborhood trash cleanup.
More and more, I’ve been noticing and been appalled at the amount of litter everywhere in this city. The lack of respect for the environment is upsetting. At the bus stop by my house, there’s just a slowly growing pile of garbage (granted, this is a temporary bus stop due to a construction detour so there’s no public waste can, but STILL).
I don’t usually have many days off, and the days I do have off vary week by week, so a scheduled volunteering gig does work for me. Also, I don’t have super reliable transportation (my sister uses our car for work, and Pittsburgh public transit is a shitshow). Trash cleanup is something I can step out of my house and start doing right then and there.
So, I had a day off today, and I set out to pick up trash.
Continue reading “Trash Clean-Up Day 1 | Quick Click”
So this month, I’ve started 40 mg of Vyvanse, up from 20 mg when I started in September, and I’m liking it so far! Here’s a little background and description of how Vyvanse has worked for me.
For the past few years, I’ve been coming to terms with the fact that I struggle with dissociation. It’s not just a quirk or a funny thing that happens to me; it’s actually fairly disruptive.
Dissociative disorders are typically caused by trauma from childhood abuse. It’s a coping mechanism by which you detach from yourself and the stressful emotions you’re experiencing so that you don’t feel the pain of the traumatic moment. It’s often described as “viewing yourself from the third person perspective,” as if you’re watching a movie or playing a video game of your life.
Now, there are 3 dissociative disorders. There’s Dissociative Identity Disorder, where people experience split personalities or identities and switch between them. There’s Dissociative Amnesia, where people can’t remember basic, integral parts of their identity and have large memory gaps. And there’s the one I’m pretty sure I experience, Depersonalization-Derealization Disorder, where people detach from their body and emotions, and/or detach from reality, experiencing it in a dreamlike distortion.
Continue reading “Coming to Terms with My Dissociative Tendencies | Trauma Dump”
Hey, I’m Nate! Welcome to Harvey Clicker, my new/refurbished personal blog.
This blog will host a variety of content and hopefully as I go on, a variety of mediums by which people can consume this content. But for now, pictures and words will suffice! This is a personal journey of self-expression, to create a space for my thoughts, ideas, and emotions to live instead of bottling them inside.
The COVID-19 pandemic has certainly rocked everyone’s world by now, exposing the struggles and missing pieces of our lives that we’ve been avoiding. I’m no different. While I’ve felt rather alone most of my life, the pandemic has forced me to reconcile with that loneliness and unhappiness. Now, a blog cannot replace IRL human contact, but it can at least help me feel more seen, heard, and understood than I am currently experiencing.
I hope you’ll come along for the ride, and maybe we’ll create meaningful connections.